Posted: 10:34 PM - Oct 11, 2003
An elderly woman and her little grandson, whose face was sprinkled with
bright freckles, spent the day at the zoo. Lots of children were waiting
in line to
get their cheeks painted by a local artist who was decorating them with
tiger
paws.
"You've got so many freckles, there's no place to paint!" a girl in the
line
said to the little fella. Embarrassed, the little boy dropped his head.
His grandmother knelt down next to him. "I love your freckles. When I
was a little girl I always wanted freckles, she said, while tracing her
finger across
the child's cheek "Freckles are beautiful!"
The boy looked up, "Really?"
"Of course," said the grandmother. "Why, just name me one thing that's
prettier than freckles."
The little boy thought for a moment, peered intensely into his grandma's
face, and softly whispered, "Wrinkles."
***************************
After putting her children to bed, a mother changed into old slacks and
a droopy blouse and proceeded to wash her hair. As she heard the
children getting
more and more rambunctious, her patience grew thin.
At last she threw a towel around her head and stormed into their room,
putting them back to bed with stern warnings.
As she left the room, she heard her three-year-old say with a trembling
voice, "Who was THAT?"
***************************
A mother was telling her little girl what her own childhood was like "We
used
to skate outside on a pond. I had a swing made from a tire; it hung from
a tree in our front yard. We rode our pony. We picked wild raspberries
in the woods."
The little girl was wide-eyed, taking this in. At last she said, "I sure
wish
I'd gotten to know you sooner!"
***************************
My grandson was visiting one day when he asked, "Grandma, do you know
how you and God are alike?"
I mentally polished my halo while I asked, "No, how are we alike?"
"You're both old," he replied.
***************************
A little girl was diligently pounding away on her father's word
processor. She told him she was writing a story.
"What's it about?" he asked.
"I don't know," she replied. "I can't read."
***************************
I didn't know if my granddaughter had learned her colors yet, so I
decided to
test her. I would point out something and ask what color it was. She
would tell me, and always she was correct. But it was fun for me, so I
continued. At
last she headed for the door, saying sagely, "Grandma, I think you
should try
to figure out some of these yourself!"
***************************
A Sunday school class was studying the Ten Commandments. They were ready
to discuss the last one. The teacher asked if anyone could tell her what
it was
Susie raised her hand, stood tall, and quoted, "Thou shall not take the
covers
off thy neighbor's wife."
***************************
Our five-year-old son Mark couldn't wait to tell his father about the
movie we had watched on television, "20,000 Leagues Under the Sea." The
scenes with
the submarine and the giant octopus had kept him wide-eyed.
In the middle of the telling, my husband interrupted Mark, "What caused
the submarine to sink?"
With a look of incredulity Mark replied, "Dad, it was the 20,000 leaks!"
***************************
When my grandson, Billy, and I entered our vacation cabin, we kept the
lights
off until we were inside to keep from attracting pesky insects. Still, a
few
fireflies followed us in.
Noticing them before I did, Billy whispered, "It's no use, Grandpa. The
mosquitoes are coming after us with flashlights."
***************************
When my grandson asked me how old I was, I teasingly replied, "I'm not
sure.
"Look in your underwear, Grandma," he advised. "Mine says I'm four."
***************************
A second grader came home from school and said to her mother, "Mom,
guess what? We learned how to make babies today."
The mother, more than a little surprised, tried to keep her cool.
"That's interesting," she said, "How do you make babies?"
"It's simple," replied the girl. "You just change 'y' to 'i' and add
'es'."
bright freckles, spent the day at the zoo. Lots of children were waiting
in line to
get their cheeks painted by a local artist who was decorating them with
tiger
paws.
"You've got so many freckles, there's no place to paint!" a girl in the
line
said to the little fella. Embarrassed, the little boy dropped his head.
His grandmother knelt down next to him. "I love your freckles. When I
was a little girl I always wanted freckles, she said, while tracing her
finger across
the child's cheek "Freckles are beautiful!"
The boy looked up, "Really?"
"Of course," said the grandmother. "Why, just name me one thing that's
prettier than freckles."
The little boy thought for a moment, peered intensely into his grandma's
face, and softly whispered, "Wrinkles."
***************************
After putting her children to bed, a mother changed into old slacks and
a droopy blouse and proceeded to wash her hair. As she heard the
children getting
more and more rambunctious, her patience grew thin.
At last she threw a towel around her head and stormed into their room,
putting them back to bed with stern warnings.
As she left the room, she heard her three-year-old say with a trembling
voice, "Who was THAT?"
***************************
A mother was telling her little girl what her own childhood was like "We
used
to skate outside on a pond. I had a swing made from a tire; it hung from
a tree in our front yard. We rode our pony. We picked wild raspberries
in the woods."
The little girl was wide-eyed, taking this in. At last she said, "I sure
wish
I'd gotten to know you sooner!"
***************************
My grandson was visiting one day when he asked, "Grandma, do you know
how you and God are alike?"
I mentally polished my halo while I asked, "No, how are we alike?"
"You're both old," he replied.
***************************
A little girl was diligently pounding away on her father's word
processor. She told him she was writing a story.
"What's it about?" he asked.
"I don't know," she replied. "I can't read."
***************************
I didn't know if my granddaughter had learned her colors yet, so I
decided to
test her. I would point out something and ask what color it was. She
would tell me, and always she was correct. But it was fun for me, so I
continued. At
last she headed for the door, saying sagely, "Grandma, I think you
should try
to figure out some of these yourself!"
***************************
A Sunday school class was studying the Ten Commandments. They were ready
to discuss the last one. The teacher asked if anyone could tell her what
it was
Susie raised her hand, stood tall, and quoted, "Thou shall not take the
covers
off thy neighbor's wife."
***************************
Our five-year-old son Mark couldn't wait to tell his father about the
movie we had watched on television, "20,000 Leagues Under the Sea." The
scenes with
the submarine and the giant octopus had kept him wide-eyed.
In the middle of the telling, my husband interrupted Mark, "What caused
the submarine to sink?"
With a look of incredulity Mark replied, "Dad, it was the 20,000 leaks!"
***************************
When my grandson, Billy, and I entered our vacation cabin, we kept the
lights
off until we were inside to keep from attracting pesky insects. Still, a
few
fireflies followed us in.
Noticing them before I did, Billy whispered, "It's no use, Grandpa. The
mosquitoes are coming after us with flashlights."
***************************
When my grandson asked me how old I was, I teasingly replied, "I'm not
sure.
"Look in your underwear, Grandma," he advised. "Mine says I'm four."
***************************
A second grader came home from school and said to her mother, "Mom,
guess what? We learned how to make babies today."
The mother, more than a little surprised, tried to keep her cool.
"That's interesting," she said, "How do you make babies?"
"It's simple," replied the girl. "You just change 'y' to 'i' and add
'es'."